I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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