It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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