who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
handjob tips. give me some.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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