we have pet lesbian snakes
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
