we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
