yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
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But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
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