There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
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