planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
