Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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