Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Randomize
