Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
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