New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
