I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
the day after is always just damage control
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
You ate ashes out of my bong
Randomize
