i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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