end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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