It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
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