I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
