I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
