It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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