barbara walters just said penis...
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize