More tranny stories later!
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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