I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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