If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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