his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
They are going to name an STD after you.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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