Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
