Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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