So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
