random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
My ATM looks so different sober.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
