Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I think people are normalizing furries
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
