What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
