I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
