You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
