Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Randomize
