Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Randomize
