went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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