Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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