I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
He uses pillows to masturbate.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
