She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
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