my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
But theres a keg here and me gusta
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
