dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
