talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
