it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Kiss
Puke
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
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