So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Text me some of your sweat
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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