i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
smell my finger.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
