lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
