Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I am one with the molecules
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
