Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
