What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Randomize
