Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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