I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Randomize
